My Obsession with Rom-Coms

The past few weeks have been very stressful, to say the least. After three months of mindlessly sitting through online classes, the harsh, cruel reality of endless assessments, assignments and presentations hit me (albeit with tons of warnings that I chose to ignore) smack on the face this month. Yesterday, however, I was taking a little respite from all of this hullabaloo and I decided to seek refuge under the ever-so welcoming, comforting embrace of Netflix.

And that’s the story of how I lost 5 hours mindlessly watching ten half-hour episodes of the much critiqued yet immensely gratifying ‘Emily in Paris’. A review of this series can be best summed by the Critics Consensus on Rotten Tomatoes which said: "Though its depiction of France is très cliché, Emily in Paris is rom-com fantasy at its finest.”

That review is very kind because Emily in Paris is filled with nothing but clichéd plotlines, stock characters and ignorant stereotypes of the French culture. It also ironically portrays the sheer arrogance and idealization with which Americans view any culture that is simply not theirs.

Now I am not saying I dislike fabulous visual entertainers like this one where effortlessly pretty and charmingly attractive actors play hopelessly perky ingénues strutting through aesthetic streets in stunningly wonderful costumes, battling their unnecessarily mean rude bosses, all while striving to find their one true love.

I simply detest how they set me up to fervently crave for a picturesque life in an overhyped, overpriced, overcrowded metropolitan city cramped with overworked people who live in the “city of dreams” with shattered dreams and failed aspirations. After hours of fantasizing, I dislike how they release me into a world that is not all love, rainbows and unicorns. I dislike how some rom-coms are downright stupid but I never seem to realize that when I am watching them. I binge first, then cringe later.

I guess maybe I dislike the product but I still enjoy the process of watching Rom-coms?

Because Rom-coms are the perfect mental vacation I need periodically and be it The Kissing Booth or Pretty Woman, they really do help, especially with all that has been happening around lately.

This got me thinking. Why is it that Rom-coms, even when they are so clichéd and cringe-worthy, so annoyingly watchable, melting my heart into a huge puddle and ugh.. so irresistible?

Why can’t I ever stop watching them?

I am a firm believer in the notion that all art is subjective but let me just re-evaluate my inferences from the case of Emily in Paris:

Does it have an incredible plot? No. It just plays out overused tropes.

Does it have a unique way of storytelling? Uhm, no.

Well, was the characterization any good? Nuh-uh, it was filled with flat characters but portrayed by good-looking actors so you can’t resist but ogle at them for 5 hours straight.

But did I still like watching it? Yes! Isn’t that baffling?

Rom-coms – abbreviated for romantic comedy are movies that are comedic with romance as their core theme. They are lighthearted, easy to follow, very visually appealing, glitzy and bubbly in costume and aesthetics. Earlier the prime focus of a rom-com was limited to providing the promised ‘happy ending’ through the reunification of the protagonist and their love interest. But now it has diversified and developed into other themes as well, like finding oneself and fortifying friendships.

According to Marie Claire Magazine, there has been a Rom-Com Renaissance in recent years as rom-coms now cater to the experiences and hopes of people from any background, age, race, income level, or sexual orientation, as seen with To All The Boys I've Loved Before, Love, Simon, What Men Want and Crazy Rich Asians, thus giving helplessly obsessed people like me more reasons to cling to them. Closer to home, we have had superhit movies like Queen in Bollywood and Om Shanti Oshana & Varane Avashyamund in Mollywood, movies I still turn to on crappy days and PMS moods.

I guess the best part about rom-coms is that they don’t demand anything but time from you. They are straightforward and literally don’t require you to exhaust your brain keeping track of what’s happening. No detective work involved. No gory death scenes or creepy stalking psychopaths involved (that’s another obsession for another time). Rom-coms are just easy on the eye, the mind and the soul. You get involved in the main character’s story, see their world through their eyes, snicker at their comic goof ups and messes and then rejoice again with them in their happiness at the end. You end up feeling happy for them, even when you feel cynical about your life.

And in this process of seeking an escapist fantasy, you may even become a better person. Psychologists at the University of Buffalo have conducted experiments that suggest that frequently indulging in these cheesy and predictable storylines could actually make us better people.

More points for Rom-coms!

Now after all this evidence, I am beginning to wonder if my self-acclaimed “guilt” in indulging in rom-coms is due to the internalized misogyny that has trivialized movies, novels, art and just about anything that dwells on “feminine” themes like romance and hope. I mean, just look at the greatest movies of all time and you will never find Rom-com as the listed genre under them. Critically acclaimed ones like Silver Linings Playbook or 500 Days of Summer have the mighty advantage of being dubbed a “drama” and not just plain old rom-coms. Is this a marketing folly or systematic sexism?

Maybe the sole reason we indulge in rom-com movies is because of the wholesome content that lets us relax. There is something so hopelessly amusing yet amusingly hopeful about rom-coms that makes it a really good source of comfort, without asking much from us. I guess in this new normal, I am a sucker for this genre.

Haifa Maryam

19/UELA/039